Monday, April 30, 2007

Start Making Sense

I wondered what impact my new job would have on my blog. So far, it's pretty drastic. It basically shut me up! Perhaps this signals a slowing down of my blog for a while. One thing I will not let it become is an obligation, a "have-to-do". I blog for my own personal enjoyment, because I always loved writing. But the minute it no longer fulfills something in me, it will be out the Windows (get it?).

I've been stressed, I've been busy, I've been sick. Let's hope and pretend I'm better now.

Some emails I've sent have remained unanswered. It's interesting to see how angry that makes me. What a waste of energy, the anger I mean. Shrug it off, Bridge, shrug it off.

Mr H stopped by to check out the renovations needed in my house. Mr H is a seventy year-old sweetheart, father of a friend, handyman extraordinaire. I don't think there's anything he couldn't tackle in a house. In spite of his age, he's sharp and very energetic, with a full head of hair, twinkling blue eyes behind his glasses, and an infectious grin. To my delight, he quickly abandoned the French formal "vous", to address me with the friendly "tu". I could see that some of the work simply didn't interest him at all while other projects got his creative juices flowing. He's at a time of life when you do things you enjoy and no longer bother with things you don't. I strongly approve. So he had a good look, and told me he'd be in touch and all of a sudden, I feel like I now have an ally to face my renovations. Then again, I've always had a weakness for fatherly fathers.

I'm getting quotes for changing the windows and once I have an idea of the complete, petrifying total, I'll tackle the Bank. I'm practicing in the garden with my reluctant son. I stand him in front of me, than I scream HOHAAH and rush towards him at full speed. He lets out terrified giggles and crumbles to the ground, in total anticipation, before I even lay one finger on him. I'm hoping it will work on my bank manager as well.

I've been eating horribly and I intend to start paying attention again this week. Training has been sporadic, impaired by sickness. Now that I'm feeling better, back to a healthy way of living: healthy food, grinding training and unlimited sex. Oops!

Monday, April 23, 2007

Sunny Cloudless Sky

The gorgeous weekend was a godsend. My pressure and stress went way down, I did zero exercise, I got some vitamin D, and I slept.

We fitted Loukhi with a small harness and tied her to a long leash so she can come out in the garden with us. Without the harness, she'd be over the fence at the first sighting of a squirrel. Grumpy doesn't have claws so she can't climb, and Fatso is too fat and knows it, so they're free to roam within the fence. Loukhi seems to think that with the harness, the only acceptable way to move is belly-to-the-ground, which is a very funny way to walk. That's fine; let her think she's handicapped, it will help keep her within our limits. Once in a while, a squirrel just laughs at her and she forgets everything and springs after it at full speed. You can picture what happens at the end of the leash. Poor thing!

I looked around my house and realized it is becoming desperately in need of maintenance, renovation, and tender loving care. I need to change all the windows, to do some work on the kitchen and the bathrooms. This means money. Lots of it. Well, it just happens that I have an extra 63.50$ sitting in my bank account that I didn't know what to do with. I wonder if it will be enough. Sigh.

Work was 100% improvement over last week. I might get used to it after all. Isn't that wonderful news? I wore SANDALS today. Man oh man, nice weather incoming. It does wonders for the spirit.

I took a five days hiatus from training, to shock my system out of its complacent mode. We'll see if it works.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

So Far

It's been a hectic week, a week of having my mind crammed with info, of figuring out a longer commute, of trying to adapt to different offices, coworkers, tasks… I've been panicked, I've been discouraged, I've been exhausted and I've been optimistic, in potpourri fashion.
I've been parachuted in someone else's office, in her personal belongings and files, so I can't really settle down. I feel like a squatter.
I don't speak about the nature of my job on this blog, so to give me a little latitude as far as stories to tell, I'll just say this: in my new job, my clientele is the general public. Our office is in a very multi-ethnic part of Montreal which couldn't be farther from where I live, an all white well-to-do families and retirees’ community.

I am literally fascinated by the people I come in contact with. They're all colors of the rainbow, they have panoply of accents, they come from so many countries and so many cultures… I have this longing to find out about each one's history: where were they born, how did they end up here, what is their way of life? Needless to say, I'll never know. I see bearded old men who barely speak English and try to imagine their lives, sixty years ago. Who knows what their childhood looked like? Who knows where it took place? I see shabbily dressed black women, with little expression on their faces, which mistakenly lead us to think they're not sharp. Then you discover, through the hesitant language, a mind just as quick as your own.

So I foresee endless material for observing a class of population I have otherwise very little contact with, and I expect it to be very enlightening.

Otherwise, however, my quality of life has taken a drop. In a day where I have to put in full work hours, eating, training, seeing my son, showering and such, my commuting schedule has increased by one hour per day, which is enormous. It brings my commute to a total of three hours per day, ridiculous. I'll do it, until I find a way out, but it will be in my priorities to somehow decrease that. I am no longer autonomous in my work, I have a shorter lunch period, I am not allowed to have a cup of tea or coffee by my side, I have less time to see my son before I go back out to the gym, I can no longer work longer hours to take a Friday off once in a while. All this, to me, is clearly a drop in my quality of life. Now if I implement a change, it's with the ultimate goal of improving my quality of life, not making it worse! So I will give myself a couple of months, to settle down into my new routine, then I'll reassess.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

New Job

No time to post. Plenty to write. Stay tuned.

In haste
Brig

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Friday a Thirteen

Friday the thirteen was my last day in my old office. I packed the last of my personal belongings, removing every touch that made the space mine. My boss very kindly took me out to lunch. I sent a bunch of email goodbyes, apologizing for not going to each cubicule one after the other. I'm not good with goodbyes, as I've mentionned before.
After lunch, my boss presented me with a certificate of recognition for five years spent with the Company. I'm such a babe in the woods. Then, she generously dismissed me, granting me the afternoon off to my surprise and delight.

I went to D's. We chatted in front of a delicious maple whisky he made me discover. We talked of the meaning of life, we talked of the values and beliefs that sustain us, we talked of cheating and forgiveness. My best friends are the ones I have the BEST conversations with. Then we walked over to pick his daughter from school. She's a sweet six years old with a smile to die for. Eventually I had to go, yet I felt we had only begin to tackle the subjects we were on. It was a lovely afternoon.

Monday, I start something new. In fact, I start with training. Not my usual physical stuff...Training as in learning. How much, for how long, I've no idea. I go in open. I can never get enough of learning anyway. What will be will be. A page has been turned.

Now, in spite of the cold, humid, grey and disgusting weather, I really need to kick myself in the butt and go lift some iron.

I don't know what impact my new circumstances will have on my blog. That, like my future schedule, tasks, physical environment, colleagues, remains to be discovered.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Welcome!

I want to welcome a little girl called Tess Gabrielle to the world, daughter of a dear friend.

Child, I have only one pearl of wisdom for you:
DON'T PANIC

Happy life little one!

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Feeling Like Garfield On a Monday

Raaaahhhhh…I vaguely remember, in a prior life, words sounding like "training" and "blitz". I achieved a blitz all right. I've eaten enough in four days to sustain me without eating again for about two weeks. I had NO idea I could eat that much. I feel five months pregnant, my head hurts, my throat is dry. I'm hung over in every possible way…clearly, a wonderful Easter weekend.

As for the training part… a puny 2.5 hours over four days. I probably broke my own laziness record. The weather was so miserably cold and humid, running outside was out of the question.
Saturday, my Structor had his Polar on but not the strap, whereas I had both, so he would come and stand beside me to check MY heart rate on HIS watch. Not much cheating possible there! With anybody else, I'd probably actually mind: "Hey, my heartbeat is private!" How to be intimate without even touching.

So, this week I'm going to concentrate on losing the thirty-six pounds I put on this weekend. This reminds me, à propos of nothing, that the exposition «Body Worlds» is coming to Montreal. It is not for the faint hearted. I don't like the ghoulish side of it but I am so interested by physiology that I might go. It must be both truly fascinating yet depressingly macabre.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Draining

I never hesitate to apply on jobs, probably my adventurous side, and afterwards I'm always reminded of how grueling it actually is: the preparation, the cramming of info, the stress, the interview...
I had such an interview yesterday. From the body language of the interviewers, of which I'm an extremely alert observer, I don't think I'll get it. I was probably good but not dazzling. Since there were many applicants for a sole position, I don't think my performance will be the BEST of the bunch.

In spite of yourself, it's always slightly depressing, that process of trying to give your very best...and your very best often being judged "not good enough" or "good but there's better".

I have a competitive nature and it will not stop me from applying again but it IS depressing. Amen.

Nothing an intense hour of spinning couldn't cure. For the first time, I was actually able to wring water out of the front of my shirt at the end... Even though my heart disagrees, I still find the sprints much harder to sustain than hills.

Easter weekend. Temperature sucks but I'd like to get in a little blitz of overtraining.

Below, a picture of the infamous quartet called the Easter Gang. While the little ones created a diversion, the tall one robbed innocent victims. That picture put them behind bars for good. Crime doesn't pay.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Found It!

I misplace my sense of humour and all my readers do is keep a terrified silence?!? I hate to say it but y'all is a bunch of toothless giraffes!
It's harsh, but it's true.
Anyway, I found it back. Loukhi had sent it rolling under the fridge.

Yesterday, a man I was very fond of left my immediate work environment to be posted somewhere else. I hate good-byes. Tomorrow, Jenö leaves for a hellish long time to go play with baby bottles. And I myself start my new job, in a totally new environment, on Monday April 16. So there are lots of good-byes scheduled. Many dear friends, whom I saw several times a week through work, will no longer be around save for special occasions we'll have to schedule on weekends. I don't doubt for a minute my capacity to create new bonds but I hate good-byes.

Nice hour long run last Sunday, under gorgeous sunshine, and easily kept at recovery pace by my wonderful HR monitor. As J predicted, I will get addicted to that thing!
On Saturday, painted with my three favorite little girls, after lunch with their father… a super nice day. They're the dearest, cuddliest things.
Today, lunch with a long time friend I haven't seen in ages. Can't wait. Tonight, three hours of sweating. With my sense of humour back, life can still be good!

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Bordélique

Misplaced: a sense of humor, dark, size XL. Please write to Bridge, at toofreakingfarawayfromthegoddamnocean.
Reward.